Friday Forwards - # 1

Friday, January 22, 2010
Okay, you can admit it....You receive those funny anecdotes forwarded to you on your email from family and friends too, don't you? Well, I have a file of them growing, and I've decided I'm just going to have to start sharing them. Besides, everyone else has cutsie day of the week alliterations on their blogs. Teaser Tuesday, Wish I Knew Wednesday, Fill in Friday. So, here's mine : Friday Forwards.

I have no idea where they originate : But if anyone ever finds out, let me know so I can credit the source. And if you have some great jokes you receive on your emails, please feel free to forward them to me at Linda(at)Linda Kage(dot)com and I'll make sure they get posted (but they have to be clean--public forum here, remember!!).

True or not, some of these are hilarious:

Men Are Just Happier People

  • If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
  • If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.


  • When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
  • When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.


  • A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
  • A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.


  • A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .
  • The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.


  • A woman has the last word in any argument.
  • Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


  • A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
  • A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.


  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  • A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


  • A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
  • A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.


  • A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
  • A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.


  • Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
  • Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING...Ah, children.

  • A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
  • A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.


  • A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!


  1. Hi Linda,

    Thanks for the smile today! Forward Fridays is a great idea. I love this one.

    Hope you have a great weekend! cheers~

  2. These are priceless! Thanks for the laugh today!

  3. Some might be accurate..... :O)