The Mean Side of Marriage
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes I am. I married the wrong man."
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A lady inserted an ad in the classifies: HUSBAND WANTED. The next day, she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing : You can have mine!
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A young son asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" The father replied, "I don't know, son. I'm still paying."
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Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
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First guy says, "My wife's an angel." Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."
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A woman's prayer : Dear Lord, I pray for the wisdom to understand a man, to love and to forgive him, and for the patience to withstand his mood. Because, Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll just beat him to death!
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One day, a housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room he called, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," the wife called back. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled, "University of Oklahoma."
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"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack said as he stepped out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would say if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
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Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed, gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
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Man : "I'm going to make you the happiest woman ever."
Woman : "I'll miss you."
LOL Thank you for giving me a huge lift today! I especially love the last one:)))
ReplyDeleteThese are great!!
ReplyDeleteSad, funny.... and all too true. :O)
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Hahaaa! Those are hilarious!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laughter~ Hope your weekend is super!
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