Friday Forwards - #29

Friday, July 22, 2011
Children's Science Exam Answers

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen)
A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarian Section"
A: The Caesarian Section is a district in Rome.

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you are eight.

7 comments:

  1. LMAO! These are great.

    Amber

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  2. Very funny!! Kids say the funniest things.

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  3. They really Do say the funniest stuff. My 17-month-old came over to me the other day and started jabbing at my stomach with her finger. "Bee-bee. Bee-bee," she insisted. Well, I was all like, "WHAT?! There's no baby in there. NO baby." Until it struck me she was saying her version of belly button. Oops.

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  4. Thanks, these are sweet- have a great weekend! Cheers~

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  5. ROFLMAO! LOVE the last one! I am soooo sharing this:)

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  6. Those were awesome!!
    Have a great weekend, Linda!

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